Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

General MWC related discussion stuff.
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Zak
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Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Zak » 02 Jun 2013, 22:16

In the most competitive match of the year, TMNT went up against TMNS today!

After a few lackluster games captained by an unprepared, undeserving, and uncaring zaknafein, TMNS looked for new leadership under the banner of Bebop's Golden Mutated Pig Anus.

The game, was Acts of Cruelty.

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Bebop decides not to get soulless

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Whereas GKG decides soulless are more useful than thrall elite (he will be proven wrong!)

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The game starts with tirri making a promise that if TMNS wins the game, he'll play with them in MWC. However since Limp has been trying to recruit tirri for the last two months, Zak makes a chilling prediction.

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As the game starts to take shape, its Asmodian/Kryptos (2 morts) facing off against Zak/Adrenaline (3 morts) to the south.

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To the north its myrk, paris, and arzenic (3 morts, 1 fg), against seeker and shaister (2 morts and 1 fg).

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And middle, there is tirri facing off against ew, who he promptly schools in the way of flag tagging.

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As the game progresses, Adrenaline and Zak push Kryptos/Asmodian off the south flag, both teams trade a couple of mortar dwarves.

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Then to the north, shaister grabs the west-middle flag, meaning victory imminent, is imminent

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Arzenic retaliates by chasing Shaister

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While Paris and Myrk prepare to face off against the formidable seeker (3 zerks, 2 morts)

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Lets see how that goes!

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However, Seeker manages to find the bright side of any misfortune, so who is the real winner of this engagement?

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Using the momentum gained from slaughtering seeker, Myrkridon, Paris, and Arzenic loop around the map grabbing flags and getting victory imminent! TMNS have nothing to fear, however, because the notoriously clutch limp is guarding their last flag with TWO dwarves.

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Oh well, that can happen to anyone, at least he still has 1 mort, which means he has a fighting chance!

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WHAT THE FUCK LIMP! HOW COULD YOU LOSE YOUR DWARVES LIKE THAT?

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Oh yeah thats right.

Well that looks like a wrap, TMNT will win the game and limp will surely convince tirri to join Agents. Wait, who owns those zerks?

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Adrenaline comes to the rescue all the way from vicious battle occurring for TMNT's last flag. With myrk in a vicious zerk vs thrall battle against Seeker the Thrall Master, this should be a close fight.

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Thats right, just when you thought we were fucked, the amazing shaister shows off his 5 ball gianting!

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TMNS, confident in Seeker, leave 3 thrall on the flag, as Tirri comes mid to rendezvous.

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Oh shit, that means we have tirri AND shaister gianting at the SAME time?

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SIDE BY SIDE? RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER? Okay I'm sorry but I have to say this looks pretty bad for TMNT right now. Shaister and tirri head over to mop up some zerks that adrenaline is chasing.

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Shaister forgets to dance in anti-climactic fashion! As rabican mocks him for his GIANT ineptitude he put on display, and shaister makes a sad face, GKG sends 3 souls on the offensive, while seeker and zak discuss potential flaws in our flag defense.

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TMNS has nothing to worry about however, because tirri has a bright green forest giant with zerk support, vs some thrall and a gholalkdsfjSDKLFGHSFD:LKGHJDSKLPGHJSDKGL

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Well thats fine because we have the THRALL MASTER on the job, how is that going by the way?

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Oh, well I guess all thats left is the gg'ing...

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A thunderous boom echoed across the canyon, as El_Seeker, tired of being known as the SECOND best Indian-American on Myth, smacks East Wind's forest giant with his mace

Well lets not get our hopes up, its still 3 soulless vs 1 red thrall, can TMNS really pull through?

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Adrenaline reinforces our home AGAIN! Well I guess one could argue that if he had just left his zerks there this wouldnt have--- well lets not focus on that, THE DAY IS SAVED! How are things going over on the other flag?

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April is right, this was a Cinderella story. But who is Cinderella in this case? Shaister had some good smacks with his FG, and Adrenaline reinforced our flag twice. Lets just let the stats decide.

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The only person ranked 2 balls in this game, Seeker, is the official MVP! Able to overcome the odds, beating the #1 Indian-American on Myth in a thrall vs FG battle, and achieving most damage in the game.

Limp, with 2 morts and 4 zerks, gets 15 damage and 1 (accidental) kill. Yes even with this traitor in our midst, TMNS was able to overcome adversity and win the most competitive game myth has seen since 2012.

Does this mean that we're going to win MWC? No, but the odds do seem to be in our favor...


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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Myrk » 02 Jun 2013, 23:23

I recall this game being decided by one of your fgs getting pussed a bunch of times, yet it got to live because they all dudded.
Wouldn't be bragging about this game if I were you, especially since I think this was your only win.

enculator

Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby enculator » 02 Jun 2013, 23:29

it's not bragging, if you read and watch pictures it shows all the fuckups happening through the game! Also it was close as fuck ending!

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Zak
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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Zak » 02 Jun 2013, 23:31

Now that Fire is retired, Myrk is attempting to steal his title of "Myther with least functional sense of humor"

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby East Wind tmnt » 03 Jun 2013, 00:32

#1 South Asian Myther*** (I'm Sri Lankan)

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby par73 » 03 Jun 2013, 03:01

Lol lets go over the game before hand


zak under alias april o'neil caps against gkg
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this is like the myth all stars game of the preseason. look at all these fresh cats and vague aliases.
the teams mimic each other in strategy. they even have a player per team who snags both fire arrows!

yes the game is that well matched!
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the game is so well matched, that neither team does anything but reposition units for the first 3 minutes of the game. I'm serious folks, this is some zerious shit.
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so the infamous SHAISTER of camper and NC is the far northern melee pack, and strays far away from his team. this is probably why NC isn't really reforming this year. he is distracted far from his teammates by his former teammate LIMP of BIA and NC fame, depicted here as 'universe'.
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about 4:45 into the game i make the first kill, the first drop of percentage after the wight healing. the ongoing engagement then becomes a landslide slaughter where innocents lose their identities.
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anyway, shaister becomes engulfed by death and mostly dies. here is a cool picture from my view point of what happened. there is no need to depict anything south because nothing is happening there except a bunch of old geezer mythers staring at each other. Note: Homer and Ghengis were not in this game. They were missed.
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Around the time this is happening, in the almost north but not quite area of barb valley, 3 Mutant Ninja Turtles face off against Zak's teams two butt cheeks. rab probably released some sort of matter out of his body while this next engagement happened. rumor has it, he started tirri's apartment fire because tirri has been paying more attention to his daughter than rab lately. :(
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Agents swoop in to team up with the mutant turtles. Chaos ensues.
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I rush into death because it seems like the most productive idea; the mutant turtles keep their distance knowing that a 5x MWC champ will carve them a pumpkin like daddy.

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Nothing happens south all game. honestly the players who played down south just excluded themselves from the entire slaughter. I guess they would probably score more introverted in honkey's personality scale test thread.

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Zak gets some good advice from adren, which causes the next game. If you want to read the epilogue of that story, go check out zak's article.

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Zak's team of butts then starts talking strategy about the upcoming MWC tournament.


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i got some stupendous statistics and all of my teammates played well and got some good statistics as well. what a lovely game of myth 2.



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p.s. here are my awesome stats for the following game where i didn't have fg (see article above by zak, @ acts of cruelty), which had its fair share of valiant efforts.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Zak » 03 Jun 2013, 03:10

What I took from Paris' article is that on barb valley the game changing players on the winning team are not on the TMNT roster!

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Myrk » 03 Jun 2013, 03:50

thisforumsucks wrote:Now that Fire is retired, Myrk is attempting to steal his title of "Myther with least functional sense of humor"


I have a sense of humor when something is funny

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Asmodian » 03 Jun 2013, 04:14

Does anyone have the films? I think there was a lichen and trow played as well?

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Zak » 03 Jun 2013, 04:16

Myrk wrote:
thisforumsucks wrote:Now that Fire is retired, Myrk is attempting to steal his title of "Myther with least functional sense of humor"


I have a sense of humor when something is funny


Strange then, that numerous people were yelling "lol" throughout the game

Your keyboard must have jammed


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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Myrk » 03 Jun 2013, 06:02

perhaps others find games being decided by duds funny, I just find it stupid and wish I were playing Starcraft instead

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Zak » 03 Jun 2013, 06:19

Myrk wrote:perhaps others find games being decided by duds funny, I just find it stupid and wish I were playing Starcraft instead


If you think thats why we were laughing, then your sense of humor is on par with Data from Star Trek.

Chill out myrk!

Most people could laugh something like this off:

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Asmodian » 03 Jun 2013, 07:08

lol just saw all that dud puss on that green fg on the red teams last flag, pretty hillus how lucky it got!

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Myrk » 03 Jun 2013, 07:26

thisforumsucks wrote:Most people could laugh something like this off:

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Yeah the fact that you think I care about some fg mishap when I won the tournament in question and you were eliminated before the finals always hits my funny bone

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Giant Killer General » 03 Jun 2013, 08:41

I agree, TMNT are the clear underdogs going into this tournament, as that is what I formed the team to be. So I was extremely proud of my team to have won that series 3-1, where the only loss was so incredibly close even with our player and pus disadvantage.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby wwo » 03 Jun 2013, 09:03

I randomed and played for both teams. Can someone tell me if I've been insulted somewhere in this discussion? Thanks!

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Arzenic » 03 Jun 2013, 09:13

wwo wrote:I randomed and played for both teams. Can someone tell me if I've been insulted somewhere in this discussion? Thanks!


yes

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby switch » 03 Jun 2013, 09:51

I find all the distaste for myth-duds highly questionable.

Thank you for posting the replays, Kryptos. I will watch them now.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby East Wind tmnt » 03 Jun 2013, 13:20

zak, to understand the future you must go back in time.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Zak » 03 Jun 2013, 16:46

wow lotta butt-hurt going on in this thread

PS: if myrk had just attacked our FG when it got pussed, instead of running away, you guys would have won.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby dac » 03 Jun 2013, 17:33

zaks trolling is hilarious.

most competitive games in a year? lol, im sure with all the randoming that care levels were at all time highs.

this shit is comical

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby punkUser » 03 Jun 2013, 18:39

GiantKillerGen wrote:I agree, TMNT are the clear underdogs going into this tournament, as that is what I formed the team to be. So I was extremely proud of my team to have won that series 3-1, where the only loss was so incredibly close even with our player and pus disadvantage.

Well played, sir :lol:

Thanks for posting films - was a fun series to watch.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Myrk » 03 Jun 2013, 20:08

thisforumsucks wrote:PS: if myrk had just attacked our FG when it got pussed, instead of running away, you guys would have won.


Which part, when the pus dudded or when a pus finally went off on it when it was surrounded by thrall?
I suggest you spend less time trolling and more time learning game awareness, you might come across as less of an idiot and maybe win a game or 2 for a change.
Thanks for the easy wins bro.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Honkey » 03 Jun 2013, 23:05

Maybe we should just consider this match the finals.... since people care more about this match than last years finals.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Zak » 04 Jun 2013, 01:21

Myrk wrote:
thisforumsucks wrote:PS: if myrk had just attacked our FG when it got pussed, instead of running away, you guys would have won.


Which part, when the pus dudded or when a pus finally went off on it when it was surrounded by thrall?
I suggest you spend less time trolling and more time learning game awareness, you might come across as less of an idiot and maybe win a game or 2 for a change.
Thanks for the easy wins bro.


Pus duds happen, its part of the map. However instead of accepting that a pus dudded, and moving on, you just give up.

And then instead of recognizing that you probably should have charged that FG, or assigned some zerks to kill it and sending the rest back to the morts, you make something up like "It was in the middle of an ARMADDA of thrall in circle formation

That is not a healthy attitude for a team player Myrk!

In case we have different memories of what exactly happened, I took some pictures.

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Your inability to accept when you've made a mistake, and this awful habit of deflecting blame onto someone or something else, is part of the reason people harrassed you for the last few years.

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That and your ugly personality :(

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Myrk » 04 Jun 2013, 01:59

Keep trolling kid.
Our team 3
Your team 0
Myth engine 1
ggs

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Zak » 04 Jun 2013, 02:05

Myrk wrote:Myrk engine 1


Fixed

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby Myrk » 04 Jun 2013, 05:47

I'm also very sad that a guy who gets off on impersonating people, suiciding and teamkilling doesn't like my personality.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby drunken_deer » 04 Jun 2013, 06:05

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nAEe-gM_9-Y[/youtube]

this shit is funnier and more entertaining than this entire thread.

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Re: Auspicious game for Teenage Mutant Ninja Squirters

Postby bone » 04 Jun 2013, 07:59

Nice review!


Zak (or whoever?), word of advice though: learn to quit while you're way ahead. Otherwise, good stuff!


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