Grim's chat articles

"...turning the godhead of the ghols into a monument to Balin's victory. Nothing else has done more to sustain the mutual hatred since the ghols raided the crypt at Myrgard for 'victuals'."
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toxyn
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Grim's chat articles

Postby toxyn » Mon Nov 26, 2012 6:12 am

Grim's chat articles
Author: grim

Summary:
Both of my chat articles from 2010 and 2012.


Famous last words

Self explanatory. Things you'd expect to be their last words.


You just know it's gonna go well when you see this...
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Yeah, when has it ever not worked?

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I'm sure Cu would love that!
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Better go check it out then!
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Meltdowns

Sometimes this game brings out the worst from us and leads us to commit a total melt down infront of our peers. This time the melt down is starring Maddew, who apparently is the closest thing we got to Eric Cartman.

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FRANS?! What are you doing?!

Post excuses

After the defeat, we get the post excuses! Those are known to be rather multiple in this lovely community of ours.


The Rocks man! The rocks!!!
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Despite the fact that this is a fairly common excuse, it's not a very good one!
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Well, in that case we got a small dilemma here.
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Well obviously they just changed the way warlocks work at some point.
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INTERMISSION

You know how you sometimes notice you've been playing myth for hours on end and then you're hungry? Well, you just need to ask your fellow mythers to recommend you some good cousines!


Here's what Khan recommends:
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I've heard those are indeed deliscious when barbequed properly!


Yeah this "mele water" is indeed rather tasty, and it's not just meant for duffs!
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Oogabooga reveals to us how he managed to get so robust.
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I don't know what Arzenic recommends here, but it sure sounds deliscious! Maybe some turkish food or something?
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When I asked East wind what his favourite cousine was, he said:
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Great moments in captaining!


There are good captains, there are bad captains and there are great captains! No one really knows what differentiates a good captain from a bad one, but I certainly hope it has nothing to do with communication.



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Y Myrk, you've never seen "the Shining"?



If you gotta give directions, you might as well throw in some rhymes to go with them.
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And why stop there? If you give orders, tell them them exactly how you want things to go!
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If you are being pussed, just draw an image of your opponent!
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Dantski prefers the Myrkridon style captaning, where one guy always gets shafted in the unit distribution.
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Golem gets his revenge.
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... and then makes it up with some positive reinforcement!
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Don't you just hate it when teams go for the same strat?
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GAME ON!



Offense is the best defense and no plan is the be.... ok.
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Bad ideas


It's not always just the captains fault if your plans get foiled...



Proof that modern day mything is way superior the old days!
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Wonder how that worked out.
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Wonder what he did. Rage quit?
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For god's sake Genx, just give him some Berks! Whatever those are.
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5 trow team, gentlemen!
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Freudian slips


Oops...



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That must've hurt!
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Myther's got some strange fixation to hand jobs...
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Cyclops is one dirty boy I must say.
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A membership in team ThunderCox will give you some crazy perks.
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I don't clash my ass with just anyone, Crun.
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Don't put it there, then!
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These guys must play myth in a prison.
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Don't! You're supposed to put it on display to defeat Bono!
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Noo! My secret fantasy is out Image
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Psych

How to psych up your opponent or yourself!



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That's the 'tude, Zer!
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Good questions!

Sometimes they just have to be asked!



Dunno. Maybe in Japan?
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Of course not.
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Obviously it wasn't Clank who made Hit retire, Paris!
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What is it with myther's obsession with other people's hair?
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Oops, Dantski!
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I guess that's a fairly good reason not to go mid then.
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Huh?
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In our series of similar questions to "but then who was phone?!"
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Are you maybe the retard?!



WHERE IS IT, CU?! WHERE???
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Well, ok then.
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Another proof that modern mythers kick the ass of old farts!
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It's always a good idea to give newbies lots of "long ranger people".
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Sad moments


Some chats just make you feel bad for some people.



Poor Blade Image
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Maybe we all are?
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When reality strikes...
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Revelations


Sometimes you just end up revealing something unexpected that you really shouldn't have said!



Who knew multiple warriors beat a ghol?
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The secret of Cyclops' success!
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Alk trying to describe to us what the Alien planet looks like.
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Holy shit!!
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Cu explaining why he behaves the way he does.
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Thanks for sharing!
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You don't need presets as long as you know how to use "e".
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Good to know that there will be no pigs in the place I'm going Image
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MARINES! HOOOOOOOOO!!!
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Statements


Sometimes people just say the truest things.



Hands could indeed useful for this game.
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FOR GREENPEACE, TOXYN!
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Obviously.
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Bad jokes


Mythers certainly have a sense of humor. Whether it's a good sense of humor, I'll leave it for you to judge for yourself!



Stormrider
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Grim
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Me again!
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Sky shatterer
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Don't you just love it when people go for the minimalist expression style on their names? Can you name who's who?!
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Ramirez
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Team Eg
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I don't know if Jesus ever gave Zer units either.





Good jokes



Storm
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Best care excuse comeback ever!




Gj Ksiaze!
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This is how you fight against sarcasm!
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Raz
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Based on the strong response, this was the best joke I could find!
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Touche!


Ouch.
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This is how you repel telemarketers!
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...oh
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This joke always works!
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WTF?


... and then finally you are just sometimes left flabbergasted by what the brains of mythers can sometimes produce!



They do!
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When you're out of time, just blow up the big "pen".
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Who doesn't hate myslef? He's such a dick.
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So if you're from "S", no one cares.
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"My wife has a dream.... of myth!"
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OBEY!
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Corn is free?! Brb!
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This must be a quote from some Stanley Kubrick movie.
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But luckily not fast enough for two kills!
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How do you "Zaknafein" a lock?
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Suck a crapshoot, bitches!
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What was it that I said about myther's obsession with hair?

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Muse telling us how how he hits on the ladies.
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Meltdown - team edition


Starring anonymous black team!


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Shameless self promotion


You know.... sometimes our egos just get somewhat inflated. Modesty is bullshit!



Henry - the man of confidence. This was a 16 player game.
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This is how Jesus feels like every day.
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And this is how Jesus feels just before that...
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What I always liked about Kugar was his humble attitude.
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Elite ghol playa Seeker!
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You sure are!
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True.
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***Now this is how you promote yourself properly. newbies!***



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Great moments in racism


Because we all know that mythers aren't the most tolerant bunch of people!



Niger is a country.
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I think we all know what "briggers" really means.
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Ok Sam.
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True story.
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No problem.
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Ludde at it again.
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Man, bashing inuits is just not cool. Bashing afghans is ok though.
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I'm not always so PC either!
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This is why the Hive was no good.
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What is this? The 60s? You only heal whites?!
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One does what one does.
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Swears, insults and cusses


Yup.



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Wonder if they make a song about this one too.
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The reason why I like to hang out with other finns, is that they are more intelligent than you foreigners.
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It wasn't even Zer who he was talking about.
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3rd?
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Classic.
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Gj Bc!
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This is how you do back up captaining!
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And then finally


Moments of prayer and divinity


When you think about it, being an atheist is kinda silly when we have Thor, God and Jesus playing this myth game right here. This shows in all of us as I was watching films, it became rather obvious that many mythers are rather religious.




Must have gotten rushed pretty bad then. Gator Jesus is dangerous.
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I sure hope Jesus gave this guy something.
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Raz is convinced that God will prevail in the end.
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Elfoid is into Jesus too!
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Of course Jesus can warp. He is Jesus after all!
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Jesus Arz.
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At this point even Jesus himself felt like participating in this conversation.
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He's not gay according to most theologians.
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I don't think Jesus cares.
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I am looking, my son.




Those are rather tough.
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Ang God giveth...
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...and God taketh away.
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Ed is a heathen who worships archers. Unless it's those Jesus archers again.
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WHY?! How is he supposed to disapprove of your sex life if he's pussed?!
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Here's how Arz starts his christmas wishlist.
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Well I'm sure he has needs too.
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Yes yes. Haven't you guys seen the movie "The last temptation of Christ"?
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Jesus is not enough for you, huh?
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How nice that she got a mention too.
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East wind with this chinese nonsense.
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*cruisering* blasphemist.
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Finally, a good christian.
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***and finally****



Cyberbob is the devil! The devouverer of souls!
[img]http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/3144/divine25j.jpg\"%20title=\"[image][/img][/size]


[size=150]The Moment of Victory


You know, the stuff that happens after it becomes clear you have won!

YESA!
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You don't hear this often enough
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This just kinda makes you feel sad even though it's a happy event Image
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Good to know.
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Classic.
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Teamwork

You know, you would never be able to reach that victory without good teamwork!

I'm not sure if they're about to attack here or about to have sex.
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Positive encouragement
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Myrk prefers to rather observe the situation rather than give positive encouragement.
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Hey, whatever keeps you going!
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Well, things don't always work out quite the way you had planned.
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I'm here you for bro.
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<u>Plans</u>

Can't do any proper teamwork without a plan!

Good plan.
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I personally got wood from this plan.
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I hate "sarcastic" captains.
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Always a good plan.
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Cocky.
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How?
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<u>Psychic visions</u>

Sometimes a lil' ESP can help you along.

Fire sees dead people.
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Lod knows just the right place for his team to go.
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grim ~still a visionary prophet when it comes to the obvious
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THEN DO SOMETHING TO HELP!
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grim ~still a visionary prophet when it comes to plans never executed
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Enculator is very attuned to the mindsets of different players.
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<u>Psych</u>

If you have no psychics on your team, just psych up the opponent or your own team!

I'm sure those iron thralls are pooping their pants right now.
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Zaknafein is a cop in real life.
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Sometimes you gotta remind your team mates about the good things in life.
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Sometimes you gotta lull the other team into false hope!
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This actually seems to work!
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<u>Moments of Defeat</u>

Sometimes nothing you do is able to divert the inevitable. Then we have egos crushed and mental conditions shattered.

That's bad.
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Chron likes to rub it in.
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Leave it to Nemesis to sound so nice even when he calls people morans.
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Myrks with wills of their own.
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Oh Liep.
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You'd think the above situation is what Kirk would do.
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The British are still gracious in defeat.
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<u>Omens</u>

Sometimes whether you win or lose is preceeded by some ill or good omens.

Happens quite often.
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Uh oh.
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What are we to do then?
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When lagging, always start pushing.
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Oops.
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Not sure if this a good or bad thing.
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Demonic possession apparently.
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Nope.
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This certainly ain't a good sign.
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This however, is!
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Famous last words

Defeat is often also preceeded by famous last words!

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They never saw the iceberg coming.
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Great moments in captaining

It is often said that it is the captains that make or break the game!

Oh...
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Golem prefers the fatherly approach to captaining.
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Crap.
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Uh oh!
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Oh the questions.
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Just you know, to see what's going on over hurr'
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I need you to kill <u>THIS</u> guy.
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Go to uh bro.
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Blade employs Irish rock bands in his team.
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Of course.
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Land way, Slinx!
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Ska also prefers the fatherly approach to captaining. You can imagine him patting Adrenaline in the back. Or maybe giving him a carrot.
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Unlike Rabican. NOOB MOEEE!!!!
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You know, just to see what happens.
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Imagine this on a hangover morning.
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Use OUR zerks!
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Backseat captaining

The captains can't bare all the responsibility! They need some help too.

Yes
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Well, if they are "northing" at north, aren't they doing just the right thing?
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Aww...
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And he did... apparently.
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For those beginning captains from the FIVE BALL CRUSHING BALL GENERAL!
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Go fast. SO fast!
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Yeah, arz!
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***INTERMISSION***

Cool story bro!

Yeah.

Cool.
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Good to know.
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Bk was like 14 at the time.
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He means the powder, btw.
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<u>What?</u>

Things that make you go wtf?

Sure.
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Cthulhu RISES!
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Is everyone ood?
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Paris is speaking in tongues.
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So you saying trows picked up zerks and used them to kill you?
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What?
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Get it?
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HELP SPIH NOW!
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<u>Statements</u>

True stories of the amazing and wonder.

Well duh. They're not called undead for nothing.
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My mort? MY, mort?
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That's cool.
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Cock1. Not cock2. Kinda like Chron1.
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Wtf. Wtf indeed.
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Ah, the days.
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It's bs and they know it! Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah!
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<u>Sexual innuendo</u>

***warning*** R-rated content!

Ok. Whatever flips your switches, zak!
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Oh he's gonna do it right here!
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I hope EW enjoyed it as much as we did.
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What a dirty plan.
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That hill told us the raunchiest jokes of all time.
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CALL THE POLICE!
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Tsk tsk! He said balls!
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That's what you get when you go to prison.
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You know, down there.
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Eeeeewww...
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Ska votes for Rick Santorum.
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What Ducky says when he goes out with the guys.
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Just eeewww...
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Why?
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Kay.
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<u>Revelations</u>

Things you didn't or didn't want to know. Or maybe you did?

Ok...
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This just makes me sad Image
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Cool story, Pogue.
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It's OK to use archers, guys! No need to hide in shame anymore.
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Unlike the rest of us.
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Sounds nice. Where's "Schoo" at, exactly?
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Rab, the man of confidence.
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<u>Questions that just have to be asked</u>

Sometimes you just gotta ask them.

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To be or not to be?
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Yeah. They took err jooobs!
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Dunno.
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EVERYTHING. MYTH REQUIRES EVERYTHING!
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No guarantees.
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No clue. Please tell us!
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Ask this on graigs list.
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And not a single hand was risen that day.
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Ska always tries to soften the blows.
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<u>Great moments in racism!</u>

Yeah! *cruisering* briggers!

Good advice.
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They always hatin' on us whites.
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Zionist conspiracy.
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Racist asmo only sees colors.
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Fire trying to defend his racist antics.
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SIEG WIGHT!
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<u>Jokes</u>

To lighten up the mood after all that racism!

Me.
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Me again.
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Kilg was just like:
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Hehhooooh.
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Hiooooooooooh!
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Worst fears

I asked some mythers what their worst fears in life were.

Those do sound dangerous.
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We all fear this.
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OH THE NIGHTMARES
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Uh. Thrall lake.
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Sucks when doctors kill you.
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Divine interventions

When we're afraid, just contact your god for help!

Like this:
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I think it's "Jesus *cruisering* Christ", actually.
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Soul trading business.
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Gospel according to Flatline.
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And you believe in Him.
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Not only does Blade have U2 in his team, but he also has Christ himself playing for him!
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Why would you ask for more lag?
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Wwo thinks nothing less of himself.
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God doesn't care.
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Falcon is so gullible.
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GKG is jewish!
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<u>Cusses</u>

After you're done with prayers, you're safe to cuss and slander again!

Will do.
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Will do.
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Terrible what? FINISH THE SENTENCE!
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Hhehehehehe. Toecutter.
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Aki is gay - AND a faggot
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I'm sure this is something dirty.
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<u>Conversations</u>

Just some conversations that I thought were kinda cool in their own special way.

Oh Froid.
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Oh snap.
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Just blame it on me.
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Not really the reaction you usually get for "stfu".
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Fix the connection in... wait for it.... NOW!
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<u>Favorite mythers</u>

After I was done with the article, I had time to ask around for people's favorite mythers!

Paris
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Just kidding.
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Aww...
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My ego is amazing.
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Absolut didn't quite understand the question.
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Neither did Monty.
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Or Jabb.
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Oh wait he did.
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Really?
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I think Kryptos wins this.
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<u>Random stuff </u>

Random stuff that didn't quite fit other categories.

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Try to pronounce this really fast 5 times!
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Oh liep and your tildes.
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Dat length.
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After rape, clean up for yourself.
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****This is how real champs do tildes****

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Complementing team names!
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After I finished posting this, I got some responses from people.

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[img]http://i1152.photobucket.com/albums/p491/shuubimus/comment2.png\"%20title=\"[image][/img][/size]






[size=85]Or nm. Maybe he's just another lost soul.
[img]http://img340.imageshack.us/img340/1512/divine26.jpg\"%20title=\"[image][/img]

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